Monday, September 29, 2008

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Major League

00:47 Thusday 25 2008
Channel OnDemand
Movie Major League
Amazing. I have found my inspiration for this blog.
After reliving the amazing run of the Cleveland Indians during the late 80s from worst in the league to the champions of the league. The Tampa Bay Rays are this years underdog. I will attempt to keep readers of my blog-o-rama informed of the progress of the Rays throughout this post-season. only the baseball gods know what is in store for weeks ahead.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

The People's Elbow

It was just the other day that I was trying to write a story about how I learned to write or use some kind of writing technology. Obviously when I was learning to write I was a wee lad. So, thinking back to a certain practice that I used to enhance my ability to write brought back floods of memories of all kinds of nostalgic things that evolved alongside my writing education. The one that brought back the greatest and most intriguing stories were those of our modern day superheroes. The fantastic characters that I am referring to are those that make up the world of professional wrestling.

Immediately when I thought of this I mentioned to my housemates how great some of these old characters were. I (actually) thought that all 6 of them in the room would immediately start exchanging favorites. But to my dismay most had never even watched an episode of Raw/Smackdown/Nitro or any of the other primetime series associated with the WWE (stricken of its infamous WWF title be the World Wildlife Fund) or WCW. Thank the heavens for one of my cohorts, Zach, who blasted the shoulder shrugging silence with Ric Flair's trademark "Whoooooo!" It was then that the greatest superstars of sports entertainment were thrusted out of my memory's retirement home. The dos of us exchanged our favorite matches, our favorite pay-per-view specials, and even the routines and parties we had while watching these physical dramas. It was all for naught though when we realized that these were just memories and decided to move onto more important things. Like, what were we going to watch while we sat and recalled small anecdotes as they popped up.

A few days went by, the wrestling bug had passed and we had all but forgotten about our conversation a few days ago. Then like a savior sent from above, under the subscriptions category, there it was, glowing brighter than Sabel's blond flowing hair, was WWE 24/7. It was true. For a mere 8 dollars a month, four if the two of us split it, was a feature that allowed us to watch all our favorites, again!

The section was filled with, get this, Ric Flair's greatest speeches, three tag team championship matches featuring superstars from the mid 90s, and 1 episode each of the premier titles of the same years. The OnDemand feature also keeps viewers addicted by continuing the dramas that occur each week by adding the following weeks episode in succession. Monday Night Raw and WCW Nitro are my clear cut favorites of the era.

Suddenly the total joy, anxiety, nervousness, and all around hysteria that existed on each and every shows initiation rammed itself back into my heart. I found myself suddenly rooting for the likes of The Rock, Stone Cold Steve Austin, The Undertaker, Triple H, Mankind, Cactus Jack, Dude Love, Jerry "The King" Lawler and a slew of all other amazing characters. Not only were the characters back from the dead but along with them came the notorious factions, a team of characters wrestling/fighting along side of each other.

Last weeks episode of "Raw" was originally aired on Sept. 22nd, 1997 and included the factions like The Nation of Domination whose members went on to become stars and even one became a legend. Farooq and Ahmed Johnson split and were mediocre individual stars. D-lo Brown went on to become a superstar and at one point held the Intercontinental Title Belt and European Champion Title Belt simultaneously. Kama Mustafa became one of the most comedic performers and enticed the ladies and fans with his signature slogan, "Pimpin' ain't easy!" and paraded around with a posse of sexy, barely dressed women while being referred to as The Godfather. And Rocky Maivia shot to superstardom in less than few years. Quickly he dropped his last name and performed as The Rock. The People's Champ (as he soon referred to himself) gained so much popularity that he could be listed as a legend in the sport because of his ability to instigate fans and opponents with his signature eye brow raise and finishing moves. Many other factions such as Degeneration X and The Hart Foundation made fans split their loyalties and created friendly rivalries within fanatics.

The characters and factions, although hilarious in their own right, are actually a stroke of marketing genius. Where most television shows appeal to certain demographic groups and others appeal to as many as possible, it is extremely difficult to have a character or plot that interests every group in the country. What the world of professional wrestling does is create characters that fit to almost any specific demographic that you could possibly think of. Hispanics (Rey Mysterio and co.), Southern bad boys (Stone Cold), hippies (Dude Love), Goths (The undertaker) preppy jocks (Shawn Michaels), Alabamans, Canadians, Brits, Muslims, anything and everything. I would guarantee that any viewer could find a character that fits them, appealing to nearly the entire world.

Though it is universally known that the action is staged, prearranged, and outcomes already determined before the ringing of the bell I cannot get over the awesome athleticism that these characters possess. The abuse these guys and gals take is tremendous even with the safety precautions taken. Teeth knocked out, implants bursted, bones broken and more common injuries of strains and pulls must be pronounced in the background of the shows. I used to watch the shows as if they were real and all characters really existed in the real world. Watching these shows now in my early adulthood has given me an even greater appreciation for the showmanship by character and the incredible, outrageous plots that these characters must play out to the last ear flick and pose from the moment they enter the arena until they resign for the night. No wonder many of these performers can make the transition from acting (The Rock and Hulk Hogan and others) so easily.

Because of this I resolve that there is no greater entertainment than fighting
to determine different championship titles with players that live on for ever, all while encased in a never-ending plot that with larger than life villains and heroins.


the squared circle

Friday, September 12, 2008

Waterworld

So the recent weather here in Madison has been utterly miserable this past week. Rain and heat and humidity and more rain. What would you say is the worst part of all this undesirable weather? Puddles, maybe? Or muddy sidewalks? Maybe its the chilling pellets of water hitting your bare skin? My opinion... The Umbrella. Yes. the umbrella is, without question, the worst creation by humanity for these watery conditions.

The personal, hand-held, mobile, temporary shelter barely accomplishes its main objective of keeping its carrier dry from falling rain. It adequately protects users from rain falling perpendicular to the ground. That is where it ends for the nylon canopy.

Immediately rendered useless with the addition of wind to this equation. I have yet to see and umbrella that keeps people dry when there is wind. Not once.

In addition, when the velocity of the wind is a touch greater we can be audience to some of the funniest scenes of everyday life. The wind blows from behind and catches the underside of the umbrella and is abruptly inverted. Adding to the humility is the awesome display that occurs when the carrier is towed away and helpless for the duration of the gust. Leaving the consumer to engineer any way to correct the curvature.

When conditions are perfect for the use of the rain umbrella it is quite effective if using it unaccompanied. Introduce a companion and what happens? The rain from one of the two's umbrella is stopped, diverted outward, and sails onto the other. Completely defeating the initial purpose. Holding two separate umbrellas should be as driven into our heads as don't throw pens or pencils or you'll get your eye poked out. The eight (at least) spokes , attached to an always shaky arm is at the mercy of the gusts, ready at any moment to spear and maim the eyes.

So why bother to open an umbrella in the event of a rain storm? A little rain never hurt anybody . . . "but a lot will kill you" (apologies for the Jumanji quote). But seriously, wear a coat or something with a hood to protect your head and spare your comrades from the added negative externalities (I took economics) associated with this rain shielding device. I am no expert nor have I found any data that supports this claim but the invention of the umbrella could be just as detrimental to society as second-hand smoke.

After using the umbrella for only a handful of times in the second half of my life and once this past week has only reasserted the uselessness of the umbrella.

Until next time, I'll be that guy soaked from head to toe...


rain cloud

Monday, September 8, 2008

help a friend out. and the world.

My friend created this commercial for a class while he was studying in rome, Italy. It was entered into a contest and is one of Five finalists for the UN's World Food Program. Its a short commerical that all you need to do is watch to help his cause. 


Surrogate MOthers

Hello Everyone that reads this.
Saw a very hilarious movie yesterday titled The Brothers Solomon.
Keep an open mind when you watch. Not the same humor that i generally like but a great one non the less.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Numero one!

This is easy man. You should do it too. good Site.